Link Love: Serendipitous Geeking

I was feeling that it was serendipitous that at just about the same time I ran into the awesomeness that is Ami of Sputniksweetheart and a wiki page needing some attention. But then I remembered that I don’t believe in coincidence.

About 10 days ago, Brooke Benoit of Rolling Ruminations sent me an email introducing herself as an American writer who has an odd hobby of writing & submitting to Wikipedia entries. She asked for permission to submit one of my picture for a Wiki page, which is list of types of Sartorial Hijab. The list indexes styles of clothing found predominantly in Muslim societies. And she thinks it would be awesome if I provided an image for “Tudung“, not a traditional image but a look with a trendy twist….

AND! She is also in InTrend magazine this month!

To see more of the stylings and inspirings that is Ami go here to her Sputniksweetheart Conservative Chic Blog. She has become my non-guilty (and now no longer secret!) pleasure.

Read Full Post »

To be a Black. Convert Muslim. Female. –LINK LOVE

from Jamerican Muslimah’s Veranda:

I wish I could tell you about the beauty. I wish I could tell you that I took shahadah after being fascinated with Islam and seeing the goodness of Muslims. I wish I could tell you how I found a family, a community and a new place to exist. I really wish I could. And I wish that because I am quite aware of the fact that Muslims don’t want to hear my kind of story. It’s too painful and too much truth for one person to digest. The reality is my convert experience has been a rocky one. It has been, at times, fraught with doubt and confusion as to why I chose to be a part of this community and around these particular people. Once the initial convert zeal wore off, I found myself in a miserable circumstance.

Read more here.

Read Full Post »

Jewels of Survival

I went away to nurse my wounds and grind fresh salt for the next skirmish. Before I began my journey, I packed a little bag with some literally light reading material; after all my wounds are fairly superficial, worthy of only a daytrip really.

At the park, sitting amongst old men napping their Ramadan away, I reached for my loaded pen and ancient–but effective weaponry—my journal. My hand pulled out some pearls instead.

Keep yourself busy in remembering your faults, so that you have not time left to remember the faults of others. ~Imam Sufyaan ath-Thawri

My pre-emptive strike was immediately canceled. I read on “Know that people who have been hurt sometimes hurt others in return because they do not know any better,” from Jewels of Survival. I can never say enough about choosing one’s companions wisely, and I shouldn’t have to because Allah already told us so. My beloved friend Aaminah handmade this quirky-looking little zine, well—really only quirky if you are unfamiliar with zines—and she filled it with so much hikmah (wisdom) and baraka (blessing), masha Allah. And as generous sister would, within the pretty pages she reminded me to busy myself with bettering myself.

I didn’t make a list of all the wrongs done unto me, as I had planned. Instead I, tentatively, began a list of my own faults. And I realized that one of my worst is that I often mistake my faults for my attributes.

Jewels for Survival, illuminated with lustrous “Poetry, Essays, Short Fiction, etc.” is available through thaura zine distro. They also have other zines, stickers and even free publications available through the site. None have been filtered down through the process of mainstream publishing and marketing. All authentic voices, all the time — alhumdiAllah!

Read Full Post »

Loved and Lost: For Julie, Thanks Julie

One of the few conversations I can pantomime fairly well here in Morocco goes something like, “How many children do you have? I have five. Mine are this and that many years. How old are yours? Mine are so and so and so and so. What are their names? ” When I first came to Morocco in 2002 I was surprised, the first few times, that women would include how many children they “lost.” It is still unclear to me if the women mean specifically stillborn and/or miscarriages. I have asked my Moroccan friend and she is not entirely sure either. It may vary from woman to woman. But each woman who has told me, has done so matter-of-factly, almost with a sense of not quite pride, but defiantly not the kind of near whispered remorseful tones in which we discuss these things in the US.

Americans generally do not discuss these things with near strangers. Many of us don’t even share the news of our pregnancy until we feel secure that it will “take” and still don’t readily discuss if it didn’t. There seem to be a societal taboo around talking about miscarriage, infant mortality and maybe even the loss of older children. When I was a teen a friend in my circle died and his mother actually lost friends during the first year of her bereavement. People just couldn’t “deal with her.” She ended up spending a lot of time with her son’s friends because we were able to openly grieve and accept each other’s bereavement.

And many, many women throughout the world experience miscarriage, yet it is still so taboo to talk about in the states that many women don’t even know that it has happened to them. I now know that I have had at least one early miscarriage, but at the time had no idea what that was. I have often wondered about the mothers who so easily shared their losses with me, why do they tell people? What is it in this culture that makes it so acceptable, even encouraged to discuss? I’m not sure, but in Islam it is believed that children or babies who have died may assist their parent(s) in their own path to paradise:

Anas Ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) quotes the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) as saying, “If any Muslim has three children and they die prior to the age of puberty, Allah will cause him to enter Paradise on account of his being patient over them.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari) *read more here*

So, again, I’m not sure if these are almost like bragging rights, but I do know that when my fourth child was born I was thankful to have had several women so openly tell me about their losses. I prefer to homebirth my children and was very upset to have to have a cesarean. I went through a myriad of emotions, but the one thing that kept coming to the forefront of my mind was all the women I knew who had lost children and how I would, of course, do anything to prevent that as well as to prevent my own children from losing their mama. I am also thankful to those mamas who in someway have helped to expand my ability to view and discuss mamahood and womanhood.

I have five kids, plus two who I miscarried.

Read Full Post »

outlaw midwives volume 1

From Mai’a Williams editor and contributor to outlaw midwives vol1:

yay!

outlaw midwives zine is here!

it has been an honor to get read so many beautiful stories, poems, essays from mamas, midwives, doulas, students, unattached women. thank you. and i am so excited to share it with all of you…because revolutionaries are born everyday…

soon i will be posting a pdf version so that folks can print it out themselves…

and more options to enjoy the outlaw midwives zine are coming soon…

and the call for submissions for outlaw midwives volume 2 will be posted soon, so if you weren’t able to submit to this zine, don’t worry, you can get another chance

online you can read it here: http://issuu.com/maiamedicine/docs/outlaw_midwives

~~~

I’m so happy to have been able to participate in this project. Outlaw midwives has helped me to completely rethink birthing. Here’s a few excerpts to entice and enliven:

From outlaw midwives manifesta by Mai’a Williams-

Our intelligence, agency, and subjectivity are central. The health of the next generation depends on the psychological, physical and spiritual health of the mother today, our levels of stress, support networks, confidence and joy.

From anti-oppression work and midwifery by K. Emvee-

Direct-entry midwifery in the US is the domain overwhelmingly of white, middle class, straight women serving largely white, middle class, straight women. How can we pretend that we serve all women when this is the case?

From Baby clothing tips for poor mamas by Aaminah Al-Naksibendi-

[Buy] shirts big – especially t-shirts. Why not? A baby looks adorable in slouchy, baggy clothes and then they will grown into them. This helps you get the most out of the shirts. For example, a bigger size shirt can make a cute dress on a walking baby, and then still work as a shirt as she grows.

*Oh definitely. My four-year old is wearing a “shirt” right now that was once a dress. And she has a favorite hoodie that says it is sized for an 18 month old!

From The Best Midwife by Me-

So, while I was pregnant and living in this country I couldn’t find a midwife to attend my homebirth. That just isn’t done here anymore. Afterall, that is not what the barbarians do. This country has embraced the barbarians’ brand of civility and medical intervention and sterileness and clinical birth settings. The citizens have bought (literally) the barbarians’ lies which tell them that if the citizens don’t adopt the barbarians’ ways of life then the citizens are in fact the true barbarians. I have even been told that homebirthing is now illegal here.

Other self-published gems (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) can be found at Thura Zine Distro.

Read Full Post »

Urban Islamic Fiction, Really?

Urban Fiction has been out of my range for a while now, since it does lean away from my continually refining Muslim tastes. You know, unlike say a movie where you get visual and auditory hints, it’s difficult to avert your eye to upcoming unsavory bits in a book without losing key plot stuffs. So I just don’t go there. But Umm Juwayriyah (Maryam Sullivan) seems to think Urban Islamic Fiction can be crafted, seeing as that is how she classified her debut novel The Size of a Mustard Seed. Even if she could pull off an Urban Islamic Fiction story—I know, I know the adage!— the cover of the book really didn’t make me any less skeptical about the content.  It looks more like a juvenile fiction read, and I have read more than enough poorly produced Islamic books for kids that I wouldn’t want to waste my time and dollars on another. After two well-read friends insisted that it’s a good book, I finally ordered a copy.

A couple paragraphs into the first chapter the author had me with, “You didn’t think you were reading about the life and times of a super—righteous Muslimah?” Well yeah, I had, but immediately I was assured, quit hesitating and eagerly dove in! In short, the author succeeds. The Size of a Mustard Seed (TSM) is about Jameelah “Meelah” Salih, a very busy sister. She works at the Muslim-owned salon, Covered Pearls, and is a much sought after hairstylist, fulltime student, adoring and obedient daughter from a blended family (convert mom and raised Muslim dad), bossy big sister, and prospective wife.

Set in the heart of an active American Muslim community TSM covers a full and satisfying scope of issues real Muslims really face, including prejudice from within and outside the community, finding the balance between self and family, and marriage troubles, including both finding and keeping them as well as the complications of converting while married.

Spoiler: The story occurs during Ramadan and describes the spread at several iftars. This book may make you crave cake and/or your other Ramadan favorites!

Jameelah is a likable sister, but by no means a goody-goody, texualized-idealized Muslimah. She says things many of us would love to, unless she remembers to count to ten and say “alhumdiAllah” first–one of her Ramadan goals. The rest of the characters are also completely believable and even recognizable in me and people I know. There are the sage elders who offer unsolicited but wise advice, the new Muslims who simultaneously need patience while offering youthful (young to the deen) inspiration and also the strugglers, like Meelah’s baby brother Adam who her umm says has “been listening with his eyes instead of ears.“

I was really surprised by the quality of the writing. This is Umm Jawayriyah’s first novel and as far as I know it is the first Urban Islamic Fiction novel. It could have very easily come off prudish and lack-luster. But it isn’t. TSM has flow. The 300+ pages seem like they are going to be gratifying read, but the writing is so seamless that they do whip by too quickly. I put off reading the last couple of chapters when I realized that after this, there’s no place to go! I finished the book tonight, here in Morocco, and it made me long for the companionship of my sisters back home.

From the author’s statement I know this book is primarily written for American Muslims, (it is our stories) and I am sure they would enjoy TSM, but a larger range of persons could really benefit from this read. There is a lot of interest in Islam and Muslims on university campuses, but unfortunately most (like 95%) of the material presented to students is written by non-Muslims for non-Muslims. At best it is erroneous, at worse it is hurtful. For educators who have an earnest interest in learning about Islam, Muslim cultures and Muslims, The Size of A Mustard Seed is an ideal starting point for “meeting” Muslims right here in the US. In my experience, books read in classrooms about Islam/Muslims usually only furthers misunderstandings because we are not able to enter the reading without our western perspectives. We just don’t “get them over there” without a cultural attaché. The Size of A Mustard Seed is an excellent way to learn about some of the practices in Islam and readers will recognize the Muslim characters from amongst their own neighbors.

I noticed that the inside cover of The Size of a Mustard Seed says “Covered Pearls Series: Book 1.” Umm Jawayriyah—we are waiting–ya’la sister!

Read Full Post »

Obligatory Hijab Post: Ye Arab Feminists, Get Out of Thine Boxes

   Reading a  little Post-Colonial-Feminist theory this morning, I came across a sentiment I have heard all too many times, but has never been my truth nor The Truth. The fallacy is that the hijab (scarf) is an Arab thing, this being said by Arabs. Then I must be some naive convert who bought the Arab-Muslim package, right?

   As an American revert to Islam, I had no doubts about the historical nature of the veil. Though I wasn’t raised Christian, when I first read about the Islamic interpretation of veiling I immediately saw in my mind’s eye the Christian iconic image of The Virgin Mary–in her veil. My Post-Colonial-Arab-Feminist scholar leaves out Mary and all other cross-cultural references to The Veil. In high academic hypocritical form, this scholar’s (like many others) biased view of her own culture is taken as Word and propagated and spread wide and reiterated and swallowed and regurgitated and uff.

   If you are Muslim, it is likely you have heard this erreouneous theory before: The hijab is an Arab custom and was only commanded to the wives of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam). If you are non-Muslim you may have heard this too. Consider: Why then did/do Jewish women have various customs of hair covering? Why did Christian’s keep/adapt the traditions? And what about ancient Roman women? And Hindu women?

   There are plenty of academic ideas applied to why various cultures sport the veil and most of them blame patriarchy and of course reject the possibilty of Divine Decrees.  That last part should go without saying, but my frustration is with the problem of the Academic Truth being unquestionabley excepted as The Truth, even by people who are religious in some form or another.

    My own approach to The Veil was one that grew out of an open-mindedness to look at a cross section of world religions while searching for my truth. Look at the Buddhist monk  in his saffron robes or the pilgrim on hajj in his white robes. They are rejecting worldliness and vanity. I attempt to do similarly on a daily bases. I resist the urge to flaunt it while I got it and instead cover it up. Yes, my hair too. Years of styling, coloring, teasing and torturing my luscious locks were done in an absolute vanity (and submissiveness!) that I now resist.

 

I just ordered the text Rethinking Muslim Women and the Veil and am eagerly looking forward to a different view, one that speaks to my Truth.

* Got Katherine Bullock’s book–great, masha Allah!

Read Full Post »