Homeschoolers Can Be Depressed

Or stressed out, or angry, or whatever else that isn’t so pretty and shiny. Life has taken on a more-than-usual hectic pace for me this month. There are a few projects I need to do with friends right now and, you know, as well as being a culinary maverick, international rollerblader, and so on and so on, I’m just too busy to write everything I want to–so let me briefly say something that is really important–Homeschoolers get depressed and stuff, but they don’t talk about it and they don’t do photo blogs about it and they suffer miserably and long and lonely. You know how sometimes we read/hear a message but we aren’t ready for it and then later the piece fits? I have surrounded myself with homschooling philosophies, dreams and homeschooling folks since I was a kid and first heard about this wonderful possibility. I have seen documentaries, talk shows, video blogs, have read books and articles and blogs and websites, have joined yahoo groups and international groups and attended conferences and so on and so on…and once, ONE TIME, in a completely off topic remark ONE MOM said that it took her five years to realize that she couldn’t homeschool the way she wanted to because she was depressed for that long.

Now, I don’t remember if she went on drugs or started running (runners are drug addicts too, ya know *Cheshire cat smile*) or got a dog or a divorce or what she did–but she said it! She admitted that she was depressed. And I don’t remember if that was before or after the final semester of a couple of pregnancies ago in which I spent my entire days laying on the couch–because I was DEPRESSED–but it was only just  recently that I FINALLY HEARD THAT MESSAGE and realized that I couldn’t do it how I wanted to and the wall was too high to get over and the lake was too wide to get around and the jungle was too thick to cut through. I was DEPRESSED.  They make great drugs for that and we’ll talk more about that later, insha Allah. And of course I couldn’t talk to anyone about it because a non-homeschooler would be too-quick to tell me to “just put the kids in school” and the Fatima Light and Bright* Muslimahs would swallow hard on their own denial and…

…And anyone who considers commenting that they don’t need “Self-help literature, therapy, counseling, drugs, etc” because you “have God, The Sunnah, The Quran, patience, etc,” —Come here so I can punch you in the lip and see how patient you are–what tools you’ve got to deal with life’s smacks. 😀

*Coined by Aaminah, I think.


3 thoughts on “Homeschoolers Can Be Depressed

  1. Ahhh, wonderful! Reality, huh? Not some rainbow room full of cute crafts and clean carpet.
    It’s a lot like home birth–all those wonderful stories and films, but dang it—that doesn’t even go into the messy, exhausted, PAINFUL side of it all. No, it’s quiet pushing, serene room, helpful husband…. Blah…
    You can add me to the record negative homeschooling experiences:
    I am NOT a gung-ho, pro-homeschooling mom. I get it, and I know what I am supposed to do, and I see the benefits. But I don’t want to. My husband, wonderful man-really, gave me no choice. This does not make one feel “well” when at a homeschool playgroup full of active moms chatting about all their outings and projects–you feel like a hypocrite royale, looser.
    Thanks for voicing the darker side to homeschooling reality.
    Love you!

  2. I formally apologize to any woman I have ever brow-beat for their choice not to homeschool.

    I feel the same way about this whole self-employed spouse thing. I get it–the benefits, the necassariness. I GET IT!!! Masha Allah, but ya know I never signed-up for it and I am still working through my reluctance and other feelings around it. :/

  3. Asalaamu Alaikum

    I’m a reluctant homeschooler too. My daughter refused to go to school and was a monster at school so they got sick of her and didn’t even want her back. Today she told me she is willing to go back to school! Happy day!

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