One of my prompts for topic consideration in the White Privilege and The Ummah Carnival was not well received, actually it was the only topic scoffed. I said:
Maintaining or discarding White American cultural norms. Fact Observation: Many white people are not trustworthy and they are arrogant—does that change or remain when we become Muslim?
I admit my word choice there was not stellar. However, the fact is, brace yourself, there does exist (with statistics and research to back it) a generalization for many people of color to distrust whites. And vice versa. In the prologue of her book Talking to Strangers: Anxieties of Citizenship since Brown v. Board of Education, MacArthur award winner Danielle Allen explains the dynamics of inter-racial distrust and cites a “2002 statistic that says that only 35 percent of Americans think people can be trusted.” And the same statistics cite that “African Americans are even less trusting.” But, what I am really trying to keep the focus on is white Muslim accomplice (residual from jilhaliya), so let’s look at why we may be nontrusting of other Muslims, as well as our own untrustworthy behaviors and how I (and others) see arrogance as related to this issue.
If you are a white Muslim and you don’t hold very many Muslims of color close to your heart, you don’t talk to many other than at the masjid for a couple hours a week, a month or a year–why do you suppose that is? And if Muslims of color are not beating down your door (other than to marry you) to befriend you–why do you suppose that is?
The lovefest that many of us converts thought was going to happen after we said shahahda did not happen. Many of our jilhaliya baggage remains, both individually and culturally. Often, even when we insist that we are free of such baggage–yet can easily see it on other people–there is subtle, unconscious stuff happening that we just don’t know about.
In a cheesy titled article from way back in pre-Obama 2002, “Why Can’t We Just Get Along? Interpersonal Biases and Interracial Distrust” researchers Dovidio, Gaertner, Kawakami, Kerry, Hudson and Gordon ”examine how interpersonal biases can contribute to these different perspectives [of white Americans and Black Americans] and ultimately to interracial distrust that can undermine race relations.” Their studies and experiments kept the focus on whites’ contribution to the problem, “In particular, we propose that there are four aspects of contemporary prejudices held by Whites toward Blacks in the United States that contribute to the divergence of perceptions and interracial distrust in the United States today.” They also acknowledged that these white prejudices extended beyond blacks to other minorities:
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(a) Contemporary racism among Whites is subtle
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(b) these racial biases are often unintentional and unconscious
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(c) these biases influence the perceptions that Whites and Blacks have of these same behaviors or events, and
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(d) these racial biases have different consequences on the outcomes for Blacks and Whites.
The researchers explain how the subtleties of Aversive Racism play out, and it completely mirrors what we see in the Ummah. Firstly, racism is now illegal in the US, so no (reasonable) person will admit to it, and also white Americans have adopted egalitarian values and therefore believe that they are not a minutia prejudice:
egalitarian {adjective} – asserting, resulting from, or characterized by belief in the equality of all people, esp. in political, economic, or social life.
Sounds like the Muslims right? We say we are all equal (period).
I am one of those folks who grew-up truly believing that racism no longer existed (except for maybe in the south) because that was what I was told by my white parents, mostly white educators and white dominated media. So when I saw and read about racism within the Ummah, I pointed fingers, but not so much at African Americans, more so at born Muslims. Again, the Orientalist in me unconciously reared her head. Those same folks who taught me racism was extinct, also taught me that the Muslim Middle East is inferior to my West.
The study asserts that Whites have “feelings of anxiety and uneasiness” about blacks. Elsewhere I have read that whites can be so fearful of being called ”racist” they simply won’t engage with blacks or other poc, to the point of not looking them in the eye! The Dovidio & Co article explains that:
“Because aversive racists consciously endorse egalitarian values and deny their negative feelings about Blacks, they will not discriminate directly and openly in ways that can be attributed to racism. However, because of their negative feelings, they will discriminate, often unintentionally, when their behavior can be justified on the basis of some factor other than race (e.g., questionable qualifications for a position).”
Again, I ask you, how many Muslims of color do you hold close to your heart? Have over for dinner? Call to check on regularly? Visit while sick? Give salams to? I don’t want to hear that they don’t do it either, we are looking at us. We are supposed to make excuses for others, but making excuses for ourselves is one of the subtle ways aversive racism works:
”[Whites'] behavior can be justified on the basis of some factor other than race.”
When I questioned the cut-off point with which to make excuses for my white sisters, I took a little flak for my observation:
“I did notice a pattern amongst a few of my white sisters to say they would do stuff and then “flake.” But really the untrustworthiness runs much deeper than just hypocritical flaking . . . the way I see it as related is that white folks just don’t call each other out for it. They ‘forgive’ each other, but are less ‘forgiving’ of people of color. Generalizations based on my observations, that’s all I got.”
So it may be absolutely unrelated that I have been repeatedly flaked on and had unconsummated invitations extended to me by white sisters, and perhaps nearly everybody does this — repeatedly? And Allhualim what was the intention with each individual instance, but let’s remember why flakiness can be so detrimental:
Sahih Muslim, Book 001, Number 0112:
It is reported on the authority of Abu Huraira that the Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings be upon him) said: Three are the signs of a hypocrite: when he spoke he told a lie, when he made a promise he acted treacherously against it, when he was trusted he betrayed.
I threw my “flakiness hypothesis” out there after reading Jamerican’s observations on White Privilege and Office Culture:
“True story: At my previous job, I was told during a performance evaluation that my response to requests is often negative. When I asked for an example my supervisor mentioned a time when she asked me to attend a function that was on the other side of town. My husband at the time and I only had one car which he generally used because his job was further away than mine. (My supervisor knew this). Anyhow, when she asked me to attend the function I told her that I would not be able to because I did not have transportation. Apparently, I was supposed to lie and tell her that I would see if I could arrange a ride. Since I didn’t do that my response was considered to be negative. (After some time I noticed that my White co-workers, no matter what they were asked, no matter how difficult, or unrealistic the task was, would smile and say yes or would say they’d try- even if they knew they couldn’t.)”
Jamerican, who is a Jamaican American Muslimah, was perceived as negative when she was being honest. White co-workers were given the benefit of the doubt–repeatedly. This behavior may be elusive and even unconscious to whites, but it is clearly seen by those who actively confront racism, “And this is one of the ways in which I believe privilege functions. White people give other white people the benefit of the doubt, maybe even when it’s not deserved.”
In one of their experiments to test the hypothesis of aversive racism, our researchers (Dovidio & Co.) found that when ”test” job candidates with weak qualifications were reviewed by white “test” employers, the white candidates’ skills were seen as stronger than they really were where as the black candidates skills were seen as weaker. Equal skills, yet the preference was for white. The researchers describe these results as “Whites may give White candidates the ‘benefit of the doubt,’ a benefit that is not extended to outgroup members.” This is one of the subtle ways that aversive racism exists, we extend the benefit of the doubt more liberally to our own. Making excuses for a sister is encouraged, but what about that sincere naseeha and wanting for your sisters what you want for yourself? Is hypocrisy and/or injustice what we want for each other?
And do you extend excuses to your siblings of color, or are you extending the wrong kind of excuses to yourself: “However, because of [whites] negative feelings, they will discriminate, often unintentionally, when their behavior can be justified on the basis of some factor other than race (e.g., questionable qualifications for a position)*”(Dovidio).
*My emphasis. So what kind of factors prevent you from extending yourself to Muslims of color? Do you label them rude? Backwards or uncivilized? Uneducated? Belonging to such and such Muslim affiliation and therefore unworthy of Muslim adab (manners)? Or worse, do you have suspicions about an individual based on stereotypes:
Sahih Bukhari, Volume 8, Book 73, Number 90:
Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet said, “Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales; and do not look for the others’ faults and do not spy, and do not be jealous of one another, and do not desert (cut your relation with) one another, and do not hate one another; and O Allah’s worshipers! Be brothers (as Allah has ordered you!”)
Allen explains the necessity of opening lines of trust to break the cycle of inter-racial distrust:
“Trustworthiness generates trust. Our life is much better when we can and do trust our fellow citizens. If both parties are working to prove themselves trustworthy and to test the trustworthiness of others, then it starts to generate a culture where greater levels of trust are possible.”
Since this is getting epic, I will have to come back to “those arrogant white people,” inshallah. But I hope you come away from this recognizing that if you do carry some of those jilhaliya behaviors, such as wrongfully extending unearned excuses one way but not extending fair excuses another, you will see how that makes you untrustworthy.
